Being a stepmom

The best thing I have done as an adult is marry their dad. The day we said “I Do” was the day i became a mom. A step mom but a mom nonetheless.I came into their lives when they were small. Landon was 3 years old and Tayne was 6 years old.It was tough. I knew there were boundries and did not want to cross them! We immediatly had a connection. Although shy we had fun.Warren and I decided the best place to meet the boys was a neutral enviroment. Ushaka beach in Durban was the venue of choice. A day I will remember forever!The most important thing I needed to ensure was that their mom knew I wasn’t trying to take over and be “a new mom” to the boys. I was however, someone they could trust , and who loves them unconditionally too. An extra person to cheer them on from the side lines or hug them when they are feeling sad.It was never all roses and hunky dory all the time. There were times i’d lie on my bed crying because something inside them told them I was the reason mom and dad got divorced or “you are NOT my mom!” This is just an outlet for all their hurt and confusion and whatever you do…DO NOT TAKE IT PERSONALLY!Tough as these times were, they are what made our relationship they way it is today. I would never change a thing. They know how loved they are and can trust me with anything.

Apart from their mom and dad I would like to think I am their biggest supporter. At every hockey match, soccer match, cricket match and parent evenings.I am definately not saying I am the best step- mom but I sure as hell am the best I can be. These boys are mine too and I have the privilege of loving them like a parent.

For anyone who may be a step parent or may soon be a step parent the only advice I can give you is to love this child with everything you have, support them and just be there for them. Thats all they need from us.Everyday I am greatful to be a step mom to Tayne and Landon.